So, it’s your first time having sex? Emotions will be running high, sexual chemistry and tension will be fully charged and the perfectly natural ‘what if I get it wrong’ self-doubts will be flooding to the front of your mind.
Yes, first time sex can be a big deal, mentally and physically; but it doesn’t need to live up to the ‘quick and awkward’ rep it’s been given. Learn how to fully enjoy beginner sex with our top 5 sex positions to help first time sex go a whole lot sexier.
How to prepare for your first time
It’s important to remember that, if it’s your first time, no one expects you to be an expert. The main things you need to think about are safety and consent. If pregnancy is a concern, ensure you have a packet of condoms at the ready.
Even if pregnancy is not a concern you still need to think about protection against sexually transmitted infections (STIs). To really alleviate any concerns, you may want to think about a sexual health screening before you even get to the bedroom.
Consent is also really important. Make sure you have both agreed to what is about to happen, and regularly check in with you each other before, during and after sex.
5 great first time sex positions
You’ve made sure safety and consent have both been considered, now it’s time for the sex itself. To help guide your way, here are 5 great first time sex positions for penetrative sex.
- The missionary position
- Them on top
- On the edge
- The dragon position
- The spoon position
1. The missionary position
Although admittedly sometimes seen as the tamest of them all, the missionary position has huge appeal for many and is most definitely a great place to start when you’re having sex for the first time. With your partner lying on their back and you on top, resting your weight on your elbows, you can penetrate your partner slowly and gradually, checking in with them regularly.
With you both being face to face, you can feel completely connected and intimate, with lots of eye contact and opportunities for kissing. Lubrication can also be used to help penetration, therefore you might like to try some extra lube for your first few times in the missionary position. This is even more important if you are having anal sex for the first time.
2. Them on top
Also known as the cowgirl position, this is a great first-time position as it allows your partner to stay in control of the speed and depth of penetration - meaning they can find out what suits them, at their own pace. This position also allows you to view and explore each other’s bodies further.
3. On the edge
This is another straightforward move physically, and not a million miles away from the missionary. To get this position to work, your partner rests on their back at the edge of the bed with their legs hanging off, while you step back from the bed and place your body between their legs.
4. The dragon position
In this position, the person being penetrated lies on their stomach with one or two pillows under their pelvis while the partner lies on top of them, mimicking their position and entering from behind. This position is much slower and rhythmic, with circular motions rather than the usual faster, thrusting movements.
It is good for beginners as it allows you to experience the sensation of sex without deep cervical or anal stimulation.
5. The spoon position
This is a great first-time sex position, especially for those who are especially shy or nervous. The partner being penetrated should lay on their side with the other partner laying behind them, allowing for one to enter the other from behind. It can also be an extremely intimate and romantic position, with your partner holding you the whole time, and allows for a lot of interaction and touching of the important erogenous zones.
Having sex for the first time is a hugely psychological experience and feeling relaxed and connected helps remove many of the anxieties which can undermine sexual arousal. Whichever position you go with, remember no one is born a sex god – it’s only by trying different positions that you will find out what works for you.
The most important thing is to enjoy it and feel relaxed throughout. It’s also important to remember to stay safe when wrapped up in the moment, and ensure you take the correct preventative measures such as a condom. There are of course a whole host of sex positions out there to try, whether you’re a novice or looking for something a little more advanced.